Conker's Bad Fur Day
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*********************************************************************** ____ _ _ / ___|___ _ __ | | _____ _ __( )___ | | / _ \| '_ \| |/ / _ \ '__|// __| | |__| (_) | | | | < __/ | \__ \ \____\___/|_| |_|_|\_\___|_| |___/ __________ #| | / \ #| \ #| _____ | / \ #| \ #| |#####| | / \ #| ____ | #| |____#| / / ___ \ #| |####| | #| / / /###\ \ #| | #| | #| _____ \ / /___##\ \#| | #| | #| |#####| \#| |#| | #| | #| |____#| |#| _____ |#| |___#| | #| |#| |#####| |#| / #|_____________|#|___| #|___|#|__________/ ##############_ ##### ##### ############ #| |#| | #| |#| _____ \ #| ________|#| | #| |#| |#####| | #| |######## #| | #| |#| | #| | #| | #| | #| |#| |____#| | #| _______| #| | #| |#| __/ #| |####### #| | #| |#| |## #| | #| |____#| |#| _ \ #| | #| |#| |#\ \ #| | #\ / #| | #\ \ #|____| #\_________/ #|___| #\___\ ######_______ ########## ##### #### #| \ / \ #| | #| | #| \ / \ #| | #| | #| ____ | / \ #\ \#/ / #| |####| | / ___ \ #\ / #| | #| | / /###\ \ #\ / #| | #| | / /___##\ \ #| | #| | #| |#| | #| | #| |___#| |#| _____ | #| | __ #| /#| |#####| | #| |#| | #|___________/ #|___| #|___| #|___|#|__| ############ ##### ##### ##### #### *********************************************************************** An FAQ/Walkthrough by CyricZ Version 1.1 E-mail: email@example.com *********************************************************************** 1. Introduction 2. FAQ 3. Menus 4. Level Walkthroughs A. Hungover B. Windy C. Barn Boys D. Windy, Part II E. Bats Tower F. Sloprano G. Uga Buga H. Windy, Part III I. Spooky J. It's War K. Heist 5. Multiplayer A. Settings B. Weapons C. Special Scenarios D. Deathmatches 6. Miscellany A. Money Locations B. Tail Locations C. Cheat Codes 7. Legal 8. Credits 9. Version Updates 10. The Final Word *********************************************************************** 1. Introduction Hi! Welcome to my fourth FAQ! This FAQ is for Conker's Bad Fur Day, Rare's irreverent, twisted, potty-mouthed platform game. Yes. This game is NOT for children. I repeat, this game is NOT FOR CHILDREN! Not only should you be mature to play this game, but it helps if you also have a South Park-y sense of humor. *********************************************************************** 2. FAQ Q: What is Conker's Bad Fur Day? A: Conker's Bad Fur Day (BFD) is a platform game created by Rare. It's not like any other game Nintendo has ever sponsored. It has bad language, sexual references, and graphic violence (Well, as graphic as violence can get for a cartoon). Q: I'm under 17. How can I convince my parents to let me buy this game? A: You can't. They see all and know all... I only help with getting through the game, not with getting the game... Q: So, why does this game deserve it's M rating? A: Well... Language: Everything but the f-word and major anatomy references are in full audibility. Sexual references: Um... Well, let's just leave it with a big resounding "yes"... Violence: Pieces of animals fly everywhere. Blood, gore, bones, aaallll over the place. Anything else? Feces, putting out fires with one's one liquid waste, and lots of other stuff. Q: Could you please just specifically tell me everything in the game that's bad? A: Okay, but *SPOILERS!!!* Language: hell, damn, ass, bastard, bitch, shit, twat, and I'm probably forgetting others... Sexual references: References to oral sex involving a cog being placed on a peg. References to anal sex in the same manner, and references to homosexuality. A boiler has large brass testicles. A sunflower has large breasts. A bee pollinates a flower, and off-screen, one can hear orgasm. Scantily clad female rock creatures and cavewomen. Violence: Insects, mice, cavemen, squirrels, bears, dinosaurs, catfish, bats, cows, weasels, panthers, zombies, all killed in violent manners. Decapitations, exposed brain, and exposed bone. Damage to crotch sensitive areas. Bodily Excretions: Vomit, urine, and feces all play a role. Feces comprises a large portion of some areas, including watching cows excrete, swimming through feces, and fighting an enemy made of feces. Mature Themes: Drugs, war, suicide, bittersweet ending... *********************************************************************** 3. Menus --- Main Menu The main menu looks suspiciously like Conker's favorite pub: The Cock and Plucker. You can view your choices by pressing left or right on the Control Stick. Game 1, Game 2, Game 3: These opened up your saved game files. Games are automatically saved at convenient places. Once selected, you'll have the option to Play or Erase. Multi: Enters the storage room in the back of the pub, where you can access the Multiplayer Menu. Chapters: Enters the cloak room of the pub, where you can access any section of any chapter you have already completed. Nice for replaying your favorite scenes... To switch chapters, just press left or right on the Stick. Options: Allows you to adjust the Sound (Stereo, Mono, Dolby Surround Sound) or talk to the Fire Imp about Cheats (Type in naughty words to get a reaction). --- Multiplayer Menu: You can choose from one of the seven games (from left to right): Beach, Raptor, Heist, Deathmatch, War, Tank, or Race. The multiplayer options are further explained in the Multiplayer section. *********************************************************************** 4. Level Walkthroughs Since the developers were nice enough to divide the game into chapters, I figure I'd do the honor of dividing my walkthroughs up as such... Well, enjoy the cinematic opening... Fans of A Clockwork Orange should pick up the parody immediately. Long story short, Conker stumbles out into the rain after a rough night of hittin' the pub. He wakes up, and has no clue as to where he is. We also learn about the Panther King, who has a problem with the milk on his table... *********************************************************************** A. Hungover This is your intro level. You'll learn basic manuevers here. Use them well, and enjoy your temporary invincibility... --- Scaredy Birdy Control over Conker at this point is sluggish at best, him being hungover and all... Steer him as best as you can around the back side of the fenced enclosure before you. You'll have a little chit-chat with Birdy the Scarecrow. He'll tell you to go to the other side of him. Do so, walking onto the podium, and he'll (to the best of his drunken ability) explain "context-sensitive" buttons to ya, whereby you press B and stuff happens... So, press B, like he says, and you'll hand him a bottle of brew, which he'll greatfully accept, and he'll point you towards the other one you just walked by. Head towards the other one, or you can press B on the same one again, where you'll give him a tank of helium (?) and another bottle of ale. Anyway, step on the other B Pad, and Conker will pop some Alka-Seltzer for ya. In this crazy world, it sobers you right up. Remember that... Conker will then explain context-sensitive a bit more clearly and you'll be sobered up and on your way! NOTE: You can only use B Pads when the lightbulb appears above Conker's head... --- Pan-Handled Thankfully, you're now in full, standard control of Conker: Stick: Run A: Jump B: Swing Z: Crouch L: Skip Cutscene (Must have watched it once) R: Hold to look around with Stick Up C: Shift camera from close to long Down C: Centers camera behind Conker Left/Right C: Rotate Camera in that direction. START: Pause the game. You can do this at just about any time (even during cutscenes) (You actually have all this from the get-go, but jumping etc. doesn't really work when hammered) So, hop in the water and swim to the island near the edge of the waterfall. Don't worry about falling off, you'll land safely at the bottom. Note the wad of bills behind the grating. Don't worry about it though, you'll get it MUCH later... You can swim into the cave at the end, and you'll reappear at the top next to Beard... eh, Birdy... Once you reach the island, Conker will remember his High Jump and his Helicoptery Tail Thing: Hold Z, then press A: High Jump Jump, then press and hold A in midair: Helicoptery Tail Thing So, it's your mission to jump and hover clockwise around the wall of this open area. Good place to practice, really. Ignore the door as you pass it, and continue jumping until you reach the bridge at the top. There's a gargoyle sitting in the middle. Have a chat if you wish. Don't try to push or hit him, though, as he'll grab you and toss you down the falls (Again, you won't get hurt). Note the lever just in front of the bridge, however. High Jump up and you'll automatically grab it. Will wonders never cease; it opens the door you passed! Hop down the way you came to the door. Once you enter, it'll slam shut behind you and lock. Fortunately, the key is right in front of you (so, why did we enter again?) Oddly enough, this key seems quite active, and afraid of you. Chase the key and Conker will remember he had something. Press B... B: Swing Frying Pan Oh, a frying pan! Of course! I can see how he forgot that... Anyway, dash towards the key, and bash him with the utensil, and it'll collapse on the ground. Walk towards it, and you'll automatically pick it up. Walk towards the door, and you're free! --- Gargoyle Now, how 'bout that lump of stone blocking the way? Make your way up to our friend here (you'll chat with him if you haven't already). Get close and quickly whap him with the pan. He'll be amused at your attempts to uproot him. He'll be so amused that he'll lose his footing and land hard at the bottom of the falls. Whatever... D'oh! The tremor of the impact jarred loose a boulder, and you've got ANOTHER lump of stone blocking your way! Look off to the right of the boulder, and you'll notice a wooden platform. High Jump onto the rock, and take a running leap over to the platform. Convenient place for a B Pad... Bada-BOOM! No more rock... Proceed through the passageway, and you'll be treated to a cutscene over at Panther King land, and you'll learn the reason why Conker will become such a wanted man in the future... *********************************************************************** B. Windy This is technically the main hub area for the game. You'll be returning here many times, and not everything can be done in one trip here, so it's all split up. I'll be making separate sections for each of the three big trips to Windy. NOTE: In the last cutscene, you learned about Anti-Gravity Chocolate. This is the stuff your life bar's made of. You have a maximum of six available. NOTE: If, at any time, you run out of chocolate (health), you'll visit Gregg, the Grim Reaper (don't laugh). He'll explain (rather begrudgingly) that Tails are your lives. Once you grab the Tail, you'll return to life. Tails will then appear around the world in certain locations. For instance, there'll be one right on the signpost in this area. --- Mrs. Bee Walk down the slope, picking up the chocolate, and head in the direction of "Nice". You'll meet up with Mrs. Bee who'll lament to you about the loss of her hive. Natch, it's your duty to get it back. Head back to the signpost, and go towards "Nasty". Walk up to big honeycombed area and pick up the hive in front of it. Once you do, three nasty wasps (Wayne and the Wankas Gang) will pop out and try to sting yer tail... Hightail it out of there as fast as possible. Don't get hit, or you'll drop the hive, and you'll have to start over. Fortunately, if you run at top speed, the stingers will just miss you. So, run like heck, and watch out when you get to the area with a green circle surrounded by a yellow circle. That yellow ground is sticky honey and will slow you down, so run around it, all the way down, past the signpost, and back to Mrs. Bee. She'll be so pleased, she'll give you a reward of 100 smackers. Now, cross the bridge, and walk up to the B pad area. Some dung beetles will notice you, but they won't attack unless you get close, so don't get close. Walk onto the B Pad, and charming old Birdy will give you info about the "manual". He wants money for it, so that's why you did the little favor for Mrs. Bee. Cough up the change, and he'll cough up the manual (note the Full Metal Jacket reference). Your cash is very loyal, so it'll hop out of Birdy's pocket and right back to you. Fair enough. Now, step on the B Pad, and you'll learn about the catapult (slingshot here in the States): Stick: Aim Z: Fire B: Exit Simple enough. Now, time to take care of those dung beetles who have some kind of thing against you. Hit one with the slingshot and it'll fly up to charge and attack. Hit it again to turn it into a gooey mess. Do this for all four and you'll be able to proceed. A door will open up in the odd wheat-like structure. You can explore the rest of this area, if you wish, but you can't do anything. You can go to the poo area, and you'll find a cabin that says "Back at 10". No can do there... Past it, you'll notice a ladder leading up to a hole. Entering it will take you to a rickety bridge, across which lies the Feral Reserve Bank... Attempting to cross it will leave you down in the mud, so you're not going that way, either. Only way to go is through the entrance opened up when you beat the dung beetles. *********************************************************************** Barn Boys This area is full of nice little farm-related surprises, and some that are not-quite-so farm related... --- Marvin Head to the right of the barn in front of you, and you'll run across a very stinky mouse (so stinky, that Conker has trouble keeping his lunch down) and a metal block with a bigger one on his back. The block wants you to get rid of the rat. To do this, head around the left side of the barn, up the slope, timing your movements so you avoid the blocks trying to crush you, and run up to the block in front of the fence, who'll introduce himself as Burt. You'll tell him Jack sent you, and he'll open the fence leading to the cheese bouncing around. To grab the cheese, hit one with your frying pan and run into it. Run back to the mouse, and he'll happily eat the cheese. Do this twice more, and Marvin the mouse will get a REALLY bad case of gas... BIG TIP! Start jumping around on the walls behind the cheese enclosure. When you have some good height above the wall that has the least height, you'll see the "bulb". Press B, and you'll anvil smash the rock. Sitting there will be a tail. Pick it up, and you'll have an extra TEN tails to your name! Pretty sweet. Now that the big block's off Jack, hop up onto the blocks, then onto the pipe lining the barn, then onto the roof. Snag the wad of cash sitting up there, and Conker will note that it's ten o' clock. You can go back and go inside the cabin in Poo Land, but, since I'm trying to keep everything together here, we'll finish this area... --- Mad Pitchfork While on top of the barn, step on the big button, and you'll open the main door. Hop down carefully, and enter. You'll find a bunch of haystacks hopping around, and at the far end are Franky the Pitchfork, Reg the Brush, and Ron the Paint Pot. Ron will mention it's the Franky's turn to do thebutt-kicking, so trot on over there and oblige him. Franky the Fork will start chasing you around, and when he gets close, he'll go for a dashing poke attack. The way to win this fight is to lead him near the haystacks, and get behind them. When he sticks the stacks, they blow. Once you've busted up all the stacks, he'll give up, and decide, since he's no good at butt-kicking that he'll kill himself. Unfortunately, he has no neck, so hanging himself has just put him in a position in which he can't move... D'oh... Anyhoo, there's a lever on the wall opposite the door. Pull on it, and the King Bee will tumble out from his perch high above outside. Push on the main door, and go outside. --- Sunny Days The King Bee will be sitting outside. Talk to him, and he'll mention the sunflower, and how he wants to "pollinate" her... Uh...huh... So, have a chat with her, and you'll learn that she's ticklish... Go back to the wooden platform near the King Bee, and you'll see a small swarm of Tickly Bees (just what you needed). They'll follow you to her, where they'll stay while she giggles. So, that's one, and now you need to find four more swarms and bring them to her. Here are the locations of all five: 1: Wooden platform near the King 2: Near the entrance to this area. 3: Roof with the switch to open the barn. 4: On the walls behind the cheese enclosure. 5: Up high in the big bucket. Climb onto the roof, then High Jump to the top of the thatch, then climb the rest of the way up. You can grab them all in a bunch. They'll follow you slowly. Once all five are there, her magnificent stigmas will be exposed in all their glory (Calm yourselves, gents...) Conker's expression during this cutscene is priceless, really... Now, the sunflower will ask you if you fancy a bounce. Yes, you do... High Jump onto her stigmas, and you'll be launched into the air, near an opening that has a wad of sponduli (money). You need to launch high, though, and it's rather tough to do. You need to press A just before you launch. If you flip in the air, you're doing it wrong. You need to launch straight up so you can hover over to the opening and snag the money. --- Barry + Co All right. Now, High Jump onto the wooden crate bouncing around the wooden platform, and enter the barn. Some bats hanging in the rafters will notice you. Once you cross the thin beams, they'll try to swoop down and attack you. Note that while you're on the beams, you'll get a lightbulb. Wait until you hear the bat squeak, then press B. Conker will whip out his trusty flamethrower and torch the offending rodent. Heh... Continue along the beams torching bats, and hit the B Pad. Conker will pull out his ginsu knives (aren't cartoons great?) and you can throw them at Franky. Aim for the rope he's hanging from, and throw five knives at him. After the fifth one, you'll sever the rope, dropping him to the ground. --- Buff You Drop to the ground, yourself, and you'll talk to Franky. He'll offer you a ride: A: Jump B: Stab Head for Mr. Big Haystack with Arms. Stab him, while trying to avoid his slaps, and he'll catch fire. Stab him again, and he'll partially burn away, revealing a Terminator-like eye. Stab him once more, and he'll bust up the floor, tumbling the three of you down into the basement. --- Haybot Wars It's time for a match with the nasty Haybot. Conker's at a bit of a disadvantage, since he hurt his leg in the fall, so you can be the most mobile on Franky. The Haybot first attacks by launching Suzie 9mm missiles when you're far away, and slaps you when you're near. If you're in range of either of these attacks, jump to avoid them. Run behind one of the three pipes surrounding the area and the missiles will bust it open. Haybot will then chase after you. Lure him into the water gushing from the pipe, and he'll be electrocuted by the wires, causing him to spin around slowly... Note the button on his back that says "Do Not Push". Hmm... Hop up next to him, jump towards his back, and you'll get the "bulb". Press B, and Conker will jam the button down, blowing his arm. You need to do this twice more, with the two other pipes in the area. Once you jam the button down for the third time, Haybot will be scrap metal. --- Frying Tonight Don't start celebrating yet. You've got to get out of here, and the water level's rising, getting really close to those hanging wires... Swim over to the big pipe with the Exit signs. Climb up the ladder, and hurry to the B Pad. You'll pull out your knives again. Hurl them at the wires nearest you. If you face towards the center of the basement, there's one above and to the left, one behind and below you, partially submerged in the water, and a third to your right and above you. Slice all three of these at the contact point to the pipes and they'll drop off. Swim across to the next ladder, and climb it. At the top, you'll do it again, although this time the three wires you have to hit are further away. One to your left, one's across the center, and the third's above and to the right. Once all three of those wires are gone. The water will rise up to its top height. You'll have an opening you can climb out. Once through the opening, you'll notice a little guy with a tablet (remember him from the beginning?) Step on his tablet and he'll fling you up. Land on the upper platform, and grab the money there. Phew... --- Slam Dunk All right. You're on the top of the barn now. Climb the ladder next to you and scale to dizzying heights. Be careful of the wasp patrolling the ladder. Timing is everything here. Move past him just as he goes past the ladder. Keep climbing, dodging the wasps, until you reach the top. You'll notice a chocolate at the end of the board, and another in thin air. Jump out to the chocolate in thin air, and the "bulb" will pop up. Quickly hit B and you'll turn into an anvil, and super slam all the way down to the bottom of the bucket. Hitting the button at the bottom of the bucket will open the grating down in the little stream area. Inside, you'll find a tail and some more money. You should have $500 at this point. *********************************************************************** Windy, Part II You'll be doing a lot more here, now. This time around, you'll enter an all-new part of Windy that could be seen as part of Barn Boys, what with the cows... --- Poo Cabin Run back to Windy, then head to the cabin in the pooey area. You'll see a cutscene where you'll get an idea on the relative intelligence of the Panther King and his lackeys... Anyway, you'll enter the cabin, and Conker will speak to a dung beetle, who'll tell him that he'll make him a ball of poo if he fills up the hole beneath the nearby trapdoor with poo, using cows.... Folks, now I suggest you not continue if you've eaten in the last hour or so... ~_^ So, hop onto the trapdoor and press B to anvil smash it. You'll hear the cry of money, but you can't do anything about it now, so just ignore it. Anyway, you'll be in a big cylindrical pit here... (If you fall, you'll return to the cabin) Jump on the ropes and use them to climb up to an opening in the wall with poo flowing out of it. Run up the slope and you'll soon come to an opening which will lead you to an outside area. --- Pruned Actually, this "verse", if you will, is pretty short. You'll meet up with a bull here (you had to be a RED squirrel, didn't you?) If you enter his little arena, he'll try to charge you. Avoid him for now, and head off to the left where there's a shack structure labelled "Prune Juice". The climb to the top of the structure can get a bit dicey, because there are balls of poo rolling down the slopes. Just try to avoid them the best you can scale the top to the faucet. Run clockwise around the spigot to open it, and dump prune juice into the trough below. If you didn't know, prune juice is a good natural laxative... So, a target just popped up, and there's a bull several feet from it. Getting the picture yet? --- Yee Haa! All right. Time to find out what this bull's good for... First, get him to chase you (not a hard thing to do). If he's just about to ram you and there's no way you can use that ram, just jump straight up into the air, and he should miss you. Anyway, stand in front of the target, and jump at the last second. The bull will smash into the target, and a door will pop open, revealing a cow. The cow will start muching on the grass. She needs a little help from you. Here's where things get interesting. Another target has appeared, but this one's part of a wall. Lead the bull here, and he'll get stuck, monetarily. Run up to him, and you'll hop on his back. He's VERY unwieldy: Stick: Move around (it's rather tough to get him where you want to go, though) B: Charge (Don't miss, or he'll toss you and you'll lose health) So, line yourself up in front of the cow and press B. He'll charge into her, and she'll walk over to the prune juice. I think you can guess what happens here... (Ugh...) Anyway, you need more cows, so the first order of business is to move this one out of the way. Charge into her again, and she'll be moved out of the way, rather messily... Now, the whole thing will have to be repeated twice more with the target hitting, the bull riding, and the hitting of cows. The only difference is that now the cows require more than one hit to get them to the prune juice. The second requires two, and the third requires three. Once you've splattered all three cows, you'll get tossed clear, and the bull will be left standing on the grate, which, unfortunately, can't support his weight... Down he goes... And down you should go after him... --- Sewage Sucks Hold your nose folks... We're going for a swim... Drop into the hole and you'll land in the "brown water". Swim over to the tail, then to the opening in the wall. In this area, there'll be a B Pad just onshore. Hop onto it, and Conker will take his "Confidence Pill". He'll get rid of his cute, little floaties at this point, and you'll be able to swim underwater: B (in water): Dive Stick (underwater): Steer B (underwater): Swim Note Conker's face as you dive underwater, as his cheeks get bigger, and his eyes bulge, he'll have less and less air. When he's reached maximum bulgage, you'll start losing health. Restore your air by going to the surface, or finding air bubbles in certain places. Anyway, return to the first area and swim down. Find the opening, and swim to the surface, where you'll be able to collect some money. Dive down again, and swim the remainder of the way back, into the cabin. Exit the cabin, and it's time for some poo-rollin'... --- Great Balls of Poo Okay... Using these balls of poo, you can open up two new areas. In this walkthrough, we'll open both of them up right now for simplicity sake. Okay. Get behind the ball, and push it around. Get the feel for how pushing something is. Run the ball up the slope to the right of the cabin (if you're facing the door) and roll it up the side of Poo Hill. Note the beetles along the way. They won't actively attack you, but will hurt you if you get too close, and they can also push your ball of poo as they move. Wait until they pop inside their little holes in the wall, and keep moving. Soon, you'll be above a really big dung beetle. Conker will add a stick of TNT to the ball, and push it over the edge. The dung beetle swallows it, and the rest is history. Don't worry if you fall through all this. If you land on the hill, you'll land safely (head-first) in the poo... Now, take the next ball of poo, and roll it up the slope next to the barricaded door. Using the same methods of avoiding the beetles, roll it all the way to the hole at the top. You're too small to fit in the hole, but the poo ball will roll down and burst out the barricaded door, opening the way to the chapter "Sloprano". You can go there now, or just finish here. While you're up here, High Jump to the top of the mountain and pick up the cash there. You can also take this time to pick up another wad of cash. Head over to the wasp's nest, and High Jump to the opening in the nest, on the left, you'll reappear on the right side, and you can jump again to the opening at the top. Go in there, and you'll snag some more dough. Take the third ball of poo, and roll it down past the ladder that leads to the Feral Reserve Bank. Note the sign that says "No Pooballs!" Sounds like an invitation to me... Roll it off the edge, and you'll hit one of the armored guards down there. Hop down next to him, and you'll see a button. Press B when you step on it, and you'll anvil smash it, opening the plug, and the two armored guards swimming around inside will be sucked down the vortex. Now, the pool never drains, but you have to stay clear of the vortex, or it'll cost you a life. Now, just swim through the door on the far end of the pool, and you'll enter a new chapter... *********************************************************************** E. Bats Tower This area's rather varied. It's a mix of water and fire. You have to be a fast runner, a fast swimmer, and have good aim (for more things than one). --- Mrs. Catfish Enter the area and you'll be immediately greeted by several lady catfish, who sound a lot like stuffy old British dowagers. They'll offer you some change if you help them with the problem of the Bullfish near their safe at the end of the river. Swim downstream, and under a waterfall, there's a small cave where you can pick up some chocolate and a tail. Swim further down near the safe, and you'll see the Bullfish snapping from his chain. Look below you, and you'll see a hole at the bottom of the pool. Swim into it, and you'll be taken to a new area. --- Barry's Mate Remember Barry? He's the bat you torched back in the barn. His friends are in this area to make your life miserable (or more enjoyable if you have a thing for torching bats). Anyway, swim to the surface of this area, and waltz over to the guys on the wall. The rather rude cog (or amicable, whatever side of his is on top) will tell you to get his other cogs. You'll do that in a moment, but first, you need to open the gateway there. To do that, step on the nearby platform with ropes attached to ride up to the next level of the tower. There'll be a series of thin rafters (for balancing acts) and climbing ropes on your way up the tower. There's a bat for every rafter, so remember to listen for the squeaks and fire up your torch by pressing B. Once you reach the top of the tower, you'll see a platform sticking out towards the other side. The lever's over there. Before you go for it, you may have heard the shouts of money nearby. Hop onto the wall of the tower, then float across from high stone to high stone clockwise around the wall. Do this to avoid the armored guards in the area. Once you snag the cash, fly clockwise to get back to your starting spot. Drop back down to the platform, then leap out and grab the lever. A grate way down back in the water will open. --- Cogs' Revenge Make your way down to the bottom of the tower, jump into the water, and swim into the previously grated area. Avoid the swimming armored guards (they won't actively chase you) and swim to the surface, where you'll find a female cog running around. Whack it with your pan and grab it, and return the same way to the mean cog. Walk up the steps to put the cog on the peg. Parents... This may be a good time to put the kids to bed... Anyway, head back in the water, and go back to the area where you found the female cog. You'll see a pipe leading into a new area. This place has two female cogs bouncing around. They're not that easy to catch, because they're faster than you and run when they see you. Best way to get them is to keep jumping and swing the pan as soon as you land next to them. It's tough, but not impossible. Return the two cogs individually to their spots, and run clockwise on the circular platform in the center. You have to get up some good speed to get going. Once you've finished, the Bullfish's chain will be much shorter, effectively removing the threat. Also, the nasty cog will get what he deserves, although the "charming" side of him rather enjoys it... --- The Combination A relatively short stanza. Head back out to the main area, and to where the catfishes are waiting. They'll ask you to lead them to the safe. Note that as you speak, the two armored guards from the tunnel come out. Now is the point where they'll actively give chase... As they get close, just hop into the air and hover further upstream to the safe. Once you get there, the catfish in charge will open up the safe, and you can just hop right in. --- Blast Doors Well, apparently this money doesn't want to live in your pocket. He hops out and steals down the shaft in the middle, and the doors slam shut behind him. Your mission now, should you choose to accept it, is to open that hatch, using naught but your trusty slingshot. How? Simple. On the far wall, opposite the B Pad, is a rotating wheel that exposes letters as it rotates. All you have to do is spell "OPEN" and voila! Hey! I said it was simple! I didn't say it was easy! Honestly, getting the accuracy down on the slingshot is tough, and to make matters worse, everytime you miss three times, or hit a wrong letter, one of the armored guards nearby jumps up and rushes you. You have to wing him to knock him back so you can try again without taking damage. So, spell OPEN, and hop in. On the B Pad down here, you'll whip on a miner's helmet, and snap in a battery. Good for seeing down there... --- Clang's Lair This area's not easy... Largely, it's because Conker's not a fast swimmer, so you'll spend a while getting mad at Conker for not getting to air fast enough... Anyway, you can think of this area has four big vertical pipes. One is in the center, and three are around it like a triangle. Each of the outer pipes is connected to the center one by two small pipes. The pipes are guarded by guys called Clangs. A Clang is basically a submerged metal eyeball that bites you if you get close. There's one in the entrance pipe, one in each of the connecting pipes, and one in the exit pipe. Now, the purpose of the miner's helmet is to blind the Clangs. It's not all that necessary, nor is it terribly useful, though, and the battery doesn't last long at all. Okay, you're in the entrance pipe. Make your way down, ducking into side chambers with air bubbles if Clang gets close. Heck, duck into side chambers anyway to replenish your air. If Conker starts turning blue, you're in trouble. Once at the bottom, watch the Clang patrolling the connecting pipes (flashing green). Follow the Clang into the one he goes into, not the one he comes out of, to be safest. You'll reach the center pipe. Swim up and grab some air. You can also snap in a new battery if you wish for your headlamp. Dive back down and head to the blue flashing pipes, again watching for the Clang. Swim through, then surface as soon as possible, and grab the lever in this area. Swim back to the main pipe, then swim to the pipes with yellow flashing lights. You'll be in the exit pipe, which is similar to the entrance pipe, in that there is a Clang patrolling it, and there are side chambers with air all along the way. Use those air chambers, and surface. In this new area, drop down the hole in the floor. --- Pisstastic Sounds good from the title, eh? When you enter this place, you'll find two Fire Imps stoned out of their skulls. They'll notice you, and notice that you're flammable. That could spell trouble. If you get near the boiler (where they hide) they'll pop out and attack you. Since they're made of fire, you'll need some kind of water-like substance to put it out, but you can't use the beer in the keg, 'cause it's alcohol... Wonder what you can use, hmm? Aw, who'm I kidding? You know it. I know it. You gotta pee on 'em. Okay. The way to do this is to head to the keg and press B to load up. Conker will be a little tipsy after consuming so much, so he'll be a little tougher to control. Anyway, pick a spot that feels good to you (I suggest near that first aid kit to the left of the keg area) and press B to start the fun! Stick: Aim B: Unzip/Zip Up Z: Extend Stream I love the music when he lets loose. Anyway, the stream's not that hard to control. Just hold Z the whole time and you'll have a nice big stream to play with. To put out a Fire Imp, you'll have to hit it with a pretty constant stream. There are four in play at once, and every time you put out one, another appears. You need to douse eight Fire Imps before you can continue. If, by the way, you run out of "juice", you'll be hungover (Conker will stop every several seconds to let out a technicolor yawn) and you'll have to make your way over to the first aid kit, where you'll pop some Alka-Seltzer, and he'll be as good as new. --- Brass Monkeys Just when you thought this scene couldn't get more tasteless... The Fire Imps will realize they can't beat you, so they hop in the Boiler to let him take over. They push a special button, and SPROING... Brass balls... Don't try to rationalize... Just fight... Well, the object here is to lure the Boiler into one of the four corners. Once he's there (under a drain), High Jump to the chain above your head. You'll dump a ton of poo on him, and he'll stagger back and wobble back and forth, exposing his batch. Run up to him and press B. Now, I gotta give props to Rare for this. They could have just stuck with the frying pan. No no no... They have high standards... Instead of using the pan, Conker takes out two big bricks and slams them together... Ow... So, all you have to do is do the same thing for each of the four corners (lure to the drain, poo dump, brick smash). Eventually, you'll knock the balls off, putting the Boiler out of commission. Go you! So, there are still Fire Imps in the area, and you can't douse them, just avoid them. You have to push the brass balls around now. One has to go on a little depression near a door opposite the first aid kit, and the other gets rolled down the slope that's behind the door to take out the armored guard behind. Finally, you're back in the safe. Grab the cash and step outside. --- Bullfish's Revenge Yep... You did all this for a measly ten bucks... Anyway, naturally the Bullfish is a little irked about all this, and he's starting to break his chain. That's bad news. Make a break for it, and he'll snap the chain and give chase. Lure him near the catfish and he'll tear into them, buying you a few seconds to get moving. Don't swim here, just keep jumping in the water. You'll move faster. Anyway, swim to the dock, and you'll do a nice little Jaws-style finale, which ends with the Bullfish slamming into the wall. You can now hop on him and into the alcove above to pick up your real reward for all this: 300 smackers! Now, it's time to return to Poo Mountain, and enter the formerly barricaded door at it's base. If it's still barricaded (we did this earlier in the walkthrough), roll balls of poo up the side of Poo Mountain; one up the slope to the right of the cabin, and the other up the slope by the barricade. *********************************************************************** F. Sloprano For once, I think I'll let this chapter speak for itself. Just try not to be eating... --- Corn Off the Cob Try to imagine it as mud, 'kay? Whatever's in that mess wants sweet corn. On the first circle path, you'll find a kernel, and periodically a hand will pop up. Don't be around when the hand is. Smack the corn with your pan, pick it up, and trot it over to the path sticking out into the center of the chamber. You'll toss it in. If, at any time, you fall into the lower muck, you can make it out, just keep jumping, and aiming for relatively solid land. Proceed around the path. You'll need to make a running jump to cross the gap. Watch out for shadows that appear on the path. That's the signal for globs to drop from the ceiling, which hurt. At the next circle path, there are two kernels. Toss them in to the center one at a time. Proceed down the path, avoiding drops to the third circle path, where there are three kernels. Toss them in, avoiding the hand, and prepare for the musical number. --- Sweet Melody Like the guy said, he's the Great Mightypoo. What more is there to say? Well, he'll be picking off pieces of himself to fling at you. I haven't quite figured out a pattern to it, yet. He sometimes leads you (throws it where you'll end up), and he sometimes throws at your exact spot. Just do your best to avoid the tosses. You can now use the B Pads strewn about in the area. Using one will pull out the solution to this great mighty problem: toilet paper! Press Z to throw... The only time you can hit him, though, is when he opens his mouth to sing a few notes... This requires you to listen to the music a bit and figure out when he'll come in. If you watch him, he'll rock back and forth to the music. That means he's about to hit his notes. That's when you toss the Charmin in... Just like your other battles, this is a lather, rinse, repeat. Once you hit him once with the paper, he'll cover up the B Pad you were using and you'll have to move to the next location where you'll have to hit him twice and you'll have a smaller window to toss the paper in. Then to the final B Pad where you have to hit him thrice, and you'll have an even smaller window to toss. Good luck to you... --- U-Bend Blues Once you've hit him with the last toilet paper roll, he'll hit a high and complex note that'll shatter the glass on the wall between the second and third circle paths. Run your tail over there and yank the chain. Fluuuushh... Oh, what a world... Phew... Snag the cash, and let's get out of this place. Head to the big hole in the center and out the exit at the bottom. Don't fall out the bottom. You won't get hurt, but you'll end up in the Poo Cabin and have to come back here and try to reach the doorway again. You'll see a cutscene here, where poor Berri gets kidnapped by a rock thing... Shyeah, like she's had it half as bad as Conker has... In this area, you'll have to do some more swimming, and, to complicate matters, you've got three spinning blades to contend with. The first one's not that hard to get through, the second one's a bit of a challenge, and the last is nuts. You're gonna have to rely on some good timing to get through here... Once you make it through the fans, climb up and out, and you'll have to make a bit of a dash around this vertical pipe, to avoid the small blades poking out the sides. Run for the ladder and climb up. --- The Bluff Now, you'll see across the path the weasel guards for the Panther King. They'll need $1000 before they'll let you cross. If you've followed my walkthrough up to this point, you should have more than enough. If not, just go back and hunt through for it. I'll have a Money List up here eventually... Okay, in this new, lava-filled area, you'll be standing in front of a three-tiered stone structure. Around the first and second tiers are little red raptor guys running around. Stepping in front of them will ensure getting chomped on, so I suggest you avoid them. You can jump over them and odds are you'll be fine, though. Make your way to the other side of the first tier of the structure, and enter a little doorway inside that'll take you to the second tier. Work your way around the opposite side of that tier, and you'll end up on the top tier, where you'll see, in addition to a wad of cash (grab it, duh), you'll see an odd face-like statue. Hop on top of the structure and anvil smash it down three times to enter the next chapter. *********************************************************************** G. Uga Buga This chapter is the classic dino-themed world with cavemen, rock monsters, and a weasel mob boss running the show. Y'know, the kind of dino-themed world in every game... --- Drunken Gits The aforementioned "gits" (pronounced "gits") are the rock monsters lying around outside the Rock Solid club. Getting within sight of them will cause them to get all surly at you and try to pound you. Don't bother trying to get past the bouncer, yet. Note the rock guy by the entranced who's curled up unconscious... First thing to do is pound on the statue one more time. This will open a passageway underneath it, effectively connecting caveman territory and rock guy territory. Run over to the unconscious rock monster and start pushing. Push him through the hole under the statue, further down the slope and you'll have an opening to the inner area of Caveman Land... Once you enter, Conker will ask for a music change (the lovable scamp), and you'll enjoy a nice upbeat track as you search this place. Okay. Here's the basic layout. You're on a slope in front of Big Dino Idol Guy. There's a platform in front of the idol. That platform is covered by a lid suspended by a rope. Behind the platform is a B Pad that allows you to pull out your slingshot. On the wall to your left and right are two big buttons that can be hit with your slingshot. The one on the right raises the lid, the one on the left smashes it down. There are four cavemen worshipping in front of the idol. If you get close, they'll attack, but you'll be fine on the B Pad. To the left and right of the Idol's neck on the back wall are doors. The one on the right is the only one you can go through, so do so. --- Sacrifice This new area has a big and rather obvious egg in the center. There's also a rather obvious monk near it with a tablet. Hop on his tablet and catapult yourself to the top of the egg. Press B on top of it, and Conker will make like a Breegull and try to hatch it. Congratulations, Conker. You're a mom... This little baby dino will follow you just about anywhere, but you have to keep rather close, 'cause his eyesight's not that great. If he gets near a caveman, he'll eagerly chomp him up, so you've got that going for ya... Anyway, you can't go back the way you came in, so lead the dino around the outside path (move slowly, it's pretty thin) and you'll reach another door. This is the door you couldn't enter from the first area. Enter it, and sure enough, you'll be back in the Idol area. Lead the little guy to the center, hop on the B Pad, and pull out your slingshot. Using the button on the wall to the right of the main entrance, raise the lid on the platform. Note the dino prints on the platform. Once your dino has filled sufficiently on the nearby cavemen, lead him onto the platform and quickly run back to the B Pad (before more cavemen appear and he wanders off to eat them). Slingshot the button to the left of the main entrance, and you'll make your sacrifice to the idol. Poor little guy... --- Phlegm Sure. You've opened the way to get inside, but you can't climb up the slippery mucus-y tongue. Of course, another monk has popped up to provide you with a lift. Hop on his tablet and take a ride to the top of the idol (you'll probably take some damage in this fall). First, hop over the top of his head and pick up the tail and the money on his neck. Hop back over and get near his nostrils. Wait for them to smoke (it hurts) and hop onto one of his nostrils and press B to pull out your trusty pepper shaker. Do this for both nostrils and, if you ever watched cartoons, you'll know what happens next. After his tongue is cleared, climb up it. Watch out for the uvula, and run inside. Run past the horizontally swinging uvula inside, then the path splits. To the left are two back-and-forth swinging uvulas. To the right are, simply, two minor jumps. The right way's arguably the safer way, but you'll eventually have to go the left way, so get some practice if you feel you need it. Run past the last uvula once the paths join, and Conker will pick up a headdress that an unconscious caveman dropped. Go back through the idol's gullet and out his mouth. --- Worship The lovely disguise Conker is sporting will now make the cavemen see him as their leader, or god, or whatever. The four that were worshipping the idol are now worshipping Conker. They'll follow you anywhere, even to Rock Solid. They're not very bright, though, so you'll have to stick close to them so they'll follow you all the way up the slope without falling off. Lead at least three up to the surface and head for the rock guys. Hit one with your frying pan, and your followers will run up and bash the rock guy to bits with their clubs. Keep doing this to bust up all the rock monsters in the area, and speak to the bouncer of the club. He'll begrudgingly let you in. --- Rock Solid Nice music, eh? If you've ever been clubbing, you know this is standard fare. Take a look around and you'll notice several rock folk on the floor gettin' down. You'll see a keg down below, Berri dancing in a cage, a few cavemen at the b... BERRI?? Huh... There she is... Well, the idea is to spring her from her prison, no matter how much it looks like she's enjoying herself. First, note the button right in front of the entrance. This opens up a door down under her cage, but it requires constant pressure. There's a rock guy passed out behind the bar. Roll him around the floor of the club, up the slope and onto the button. Now, that open door leads to the top balcony, where there are two rock babes dancing, and another button. This button opens up the other two doors on the ground floor. Once again, it needs constant pressure, but how to get a rock through that door, so you can get it up there? The answer, as is the answer to most problems, is your bodily fluids... Head over to the keg and load yourself up. Waddle over to the rock guy nearest the center door, line yourself up so that he's between you and the door, and let 'er rip. Be sure to make use of the Z button to extend your stream. You need to push him into the hole, and it may take a couple of tries before you get it right, so don't get discouraged if you screw up once or twice. All it'll cost you is one health piece when the guy gets back up and pounds you if you mess up. So, once he's through (and you're sobered up, using the first aid kit in the middle of the room on the little plateau), hop up to the balcony using the platforms near the left door (don't go through the center door, unless you feel like losing health), and push the rock guy along the balcony. Watch out for the rock girls dancing up here. They'll push the rock guy back to the ground given half a chance (and you'll have to do it all over again). Wait until they're making their way back into their little alcoves, then push as hard as possible. Push him onto the button, and the other two doors will open. Tank up once again and push the other rock guys through their respective doors the same way (By the way, you can't push the girls, they'll just shriek and duck). They'll each land on top of Berri's cage, and the second one will smash the cage open. Berri will take off (she doesn't recognize you) and you can enter where her cage was and pick up the wad of dough there. Try to leave, but the bouncer will stop you and take you to see the Boss... --- Bomb Run The Boss (basically a weasel mafia-type guy), will give youse a little job. You have to take a bomb into the cavemen's place and drop it in the place where you found the dino egg. This is kinda tough, because you have just about enough time to get the bomb to the place where it needs to be dropped, so you'll need to book, and it'll probably take you more than one try. So, run as fast as your little legs will carry you down to the temple. Run down most of the slope, but drop off when the drop is about one and a half the height of Conker, so you don't get hurt, which will set off the bomb. Head straight for the tongue of the idol and run inside its throat the moment you've got an opening in the uvula. Inside the throat, you'll have to take the left path, since you can't jump with the bomb. Move as soon as you get openings and run your tail off all the way to the end. Once you're out, move all the way to the far edge of the platform, and you'll drop the bomb. The aftermath of the explosion basically filled the whole place up with lava. Hop along the rather obvious path of stones and exit by the rather obvious door at the end. --- Mugged Exiting to fresh air, Conker will meet up with some rough-looking cave guys who'll immediately bonk him and swipe his money. When he comes to, he'll see the four baddies with his money on their hoverboards. During the taunting, one falls off his board, so the remaining three challenge Conker to a race to get his money back. Run up the path to the opening and you'll appear in an alcove above the board. Hop on: Stick Up: Speed up Stick Down: Slow down Stick Left/Right: Turn A: Jump B: Frying Pan This is probably the first place you'll lose a lot of lives, and you'll probably get some Game Overs, too. The biggest pain you'll find here is the brontosaur that walks back and forth at a couple of points along the track. He'll turn you into hamburger in no time if you run into him at full speed. Minor bumps will only cost you one chocolate bar, but major crashes will blow you to pieces. Take care when riding, and don't hesitate to hit the brakes if it means you'll live for a while longer. So, the basic idea of this race is to catch up with the cavemen and whap 'em with the pan. You'll get a portion of your money back each time. Knock all three out and a gate near the entrance will open up, and you'll need to make a flying leap from a stone jump into the cave, grabbing the wad of cash along the way. Note that after you knock out the first two guys, the map will change slightly. The gate early on has moved, and now you have to bear right when you reach the gate. Just a heads up. --- Raptor Food You'll lose control of the board, crash into the side of a platform, and tumble headlong into an arena, where you'll see a huge crowd in the stands, and a couple of huge people at the head chairs: Buga the Knut and his girlfriend, Jugga. Yep... Anyway, head towards the drawbridge to start the party. Buga will send out "Fangy" to deal with you. Fangy has a taste for just about anything that wanders into his path. Several cavemen will also be released into the area. You have one of two options here, and the second is far more useful. The first option is to lead Fangy around towards the cavemen and he'll gobble them up when he catches sight of them. This is risky, because, if Fangy gets you, you'll lose two chocolate bars, one in the bite, the second in the throw. The second, and far better, option, is to go towards the B Pad in the middle of the arena, and press B when Fangy's close. You'll pull out your watch, and hypnotize the guy, and climb on for some caveman- munching fun: Stick: Move A: Jump B: Bite (Swallow if something's in his mouth) Z: Headbutt B while running: Dashing Headbutt Run around with Fangy to get a feel for his movement. Run into any caveman, and he'll automatically pick it up in his mouth, where you can press B to swallow him. Eat up all the cavemen in the area, and Buga will call in the infantry. Specifically, six guys with clubs. If the guys with clubs hit you while you're on Fangy, you'll be knocked off, and you'll have to do the hypnosis thing again. (This time it won't be automatic, so stop when you hear the *boing* and Fangy lowers his head) The way to beat these guys is to run into a caveman to pick him up, then run away from the pack. When you're a good distance, then you can swallow him. If you stay in the pack to swallow, you'll be hit. Eat all the infantry guys, and Buga will send out the next wave. These guys have throwing spears. Attack them in the same way. Just be mindful of flying spears Once you finish off the spear-throwers, you'll fight a combined wave of three clubbers and three spear-throwers. Gobble them up, and Buga himself will challenge you. --- Buga the Knut Buga's pretty big, so unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your point of view), you'll only be able to attack him in two places: his crotch, and his rear. When he jumps, be prepared to jump yourself, as he'll send out a shockwave. When he rears back his bone, he'll bring it down on your head. If any of these attacks hit you, you'll be knocked from Fangy. Fortunately, Fangy has recognized you as his friend now, and he'll automatically run to you so you can hop back on. So, just as Buga rears up his bone, or after he jumps, bite him in the crotch. His loincloth will drop and he'll cover himself. This is the time to run around the back. A lightbulb will pop up. Press B, and Fangy will take a nice big hunk out of his keister. After which, Buga will pull his cloth up and you can do it again. Bite him in the butt three times, and you'll win, and Buga's horrible secret will be exposed. After Buga takes off and you lose Fangy, hop into the opening that the soldiers came out of. You'll speak to Jugga, and you'll be able to leave. Chase after the cash that runs off. In the next room, you'll be above the very first temple that got you entry to this whole mess. Move on to the next area. Now, you're in the area with the two guard weasels. Note the tail across the way. Hop up on the left side of the gate you just exited from and make your way across the platforms over there. It's a five-tail! A fitting reward for making you go a bit out of your way. Anyway, proceed along the ledge you're on, and hop off when you reach the end. You'll land in the sewage river that has the spinning blades. Hop out of the muck and leave and you'll be back in the Great Mightypoo's lair. Hop down into the hole and you'll be back in Poo Cabin. *********************************************************************** H. Windy III Conker's bad day is almost half over at this point. These are the last tasks you'll have to perform in Windy. --- Wasps' Revenge As soon as you exit Poo Cabin, you'll notice the wasps carrying off the hive again. Talk to Mrs. Bee, and Conker will haggle over the price of getting back the hive this time. Make your way into the wasps' nest. Once you reach the hive, you'll hop in. Time for some wasp whackin': Stick: Aim A: Jump in or out of Turret B: Manually Reload Z: Fire Up C/Down C: Zoom in and out The machine gun has about sixty or seventy rounds per belt, so don't worry too much about having to reload. Note that you have a radar here. Use it. The blue dots are wasps and the top highlighted quadrant of the circle is the way you're facing. When a blue dot turns red, that means a wasp is getting ready to attack you. Turn as quickly as you can and nail him, or you'll get hurt. A wave will come out of each of the three sets of holes around the nest, then you'll get a combined wave out of all three. Shoot them all down, and Mrs. Bee will tell you to move your tail. Jump out and grab the hive. Your old friends, the three wasps, will come out at this point and try to sting you again. Same strategy as oh so long ago: Run, avoid the sticky honey part, and don't stop for anything. Once you drop the hive, Mrs. Bee will reward you with $400. Nice... --- Mr. Barrel Now, it's finally time to scale the hill leading to the windmill. All along the way, you'll run into these nasty worm-types. Jump over them as they pop out and you won't be hurt. Just take it slow and you'll be fine. Once you reach the top, Mr. Barrel will ask for money, but he won't say how much. Being the nice guy I am, I'll tell you that you need at least $2110. If you have all the money up to this point, you should have $2210. Once you have enough, he'll offer you a ride. Hop on, and use the Control Stick to steer your way down the hill. Be careful, it's not easy. Once you reach the bottom of the hill, Mr. Barrel will crash through the blocked passage at the end of the stream, and you'll be knocked out, to awaken when it's dark out. Time for some nighttime action. *********************************************************************** I. Spooky Time for the game to stop playing around with you. This is where it gets tough, not to mention pretty darn scary. My compliments to Rare on their excellent job on the scare factor, here... --- Mr. Death Your return to the stream will be blocked off as you enter here. Oh well... Proceed down the stream and you'll reach a lake. To your far left is the exit out of this whole place. Naturally, you won't be able to reach it yet... Across from you is Gregg, swatting at the catfish in the water. (He hates cats...) Up the dock path, you'll find a closed door. Downstream to the right is a passageway. Enter it, and you'll see a lever. Jump on the lever, and you'll open the big closed door. Swim back to Gregg, and he'll tell you about the undead up there. (He hates undead, too...) He'll give you a Shotgun and tell you you need to shoot them in the head to kill them. B: Take out/Put away the Shotgun A: No function (You can't jump while it's out) Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe (Hold Z while in aiming mode and you'll get a laser sight. Release Z to fire.) Right, now that you're armed, those zombies don't stand a chance. Enter the graveyard, and you'll quickly be set upon by zombies. They move pretty fast when they want to, so quickly try to hop onto one of the tombstones. From there, it's easy to snipe at them with the shotgun. Move through the graveyard slowly, and hop onto a stone when zombies appear. Once twelve have been re-killed, Gregg will pop up and open the door at the end of the graveyard for you. Make a beeline to the door, ignoring the remainder of the zombies and you can make your way to the next area. This area is a curving thin path up to the mansion on the hill. Along this path are bony worms, much like the worms back and Windy when you tried to get to the barrel. Just like with the worms before, take it slow, and jump over them so they'll miss you. Once you reach the top of the hill, you can enter the mansion. Yippee... --- Count Batula Okay, the chapter is Count Batula, but the tomb out in the garden says Count Conkula. Oh, well... I'll just call him the Count... The Count, doing the best Gary Oldman impersonation ever, welcomes you to his mansion and gives you some food. Long story short, he's a vampire and bites Conker, but he needs your help. Villagers have assaulted the mansion and you need to help the Count get rid of them. Oddly enough, you've been turned into a bat, and you'll need to use your bat powers to help your ancestor: Stick: Crawl on the ground/Aim your flight path A: Flap upwards B: Flap forwards Z: Drop guano Controlling Conker in the air is much like flying anywhere else. Back pulls you up. Forward makes you dive. Here's the layout of the mansion. You start in the grinding room. The main hall is in front of you. The dining room is to the left of you. The library is to the right of you. The garden is behind you. There are doors connecting most every room to one another, but not all are in a good state, but, since you're in the air, you'll be fine for now. There are three villagers in the main hall, three in the library, and two in the garden. You know you're getting close when your sonar flashes. The villager you're closest to will flash red, and you can press Z to release your guano. A direct hit will knock the villager out, and you can dive down and pick him up. Naturally, flying will be somewhat hindered while carrying a villager, so be careful, because the villagers will attack with flying stakes, and they hurt. Carry a villager back to the grinding room and you'll drop it in. The Count will fill up with the blood produced. Keep grabbing villagers in the same way, and the Count will continue to fill up. After seven villagers, the Count will get so heavy that the rope he's hanging from will break, and he'll drop into the grinders himself... Dang... --- Zombies Well. The good news is, you're not a bat, and the villagers are not a threat. The bad news is, you're locked in here, and zombies have taken the place over. Want more bad news? There are three separate keys to open the lock to get out of here. Still more? There's a very limited supply of chocolate. All right. Don't panic. Best strategy for survival is to clean out the zombies in an area before you grab the key, because while you hold a key, you're slower, you can't jump, and you can't defend yourself. Also, if you get hit or fall from a height, you'll drop the key and have to start all over again. One thing that's kind of a pain is that there will almost always be at least one zombie that will respawn when you return to an area with a key, so dodging them will have to be a skill you develop early on. Key 1: Okay, the first key you need is in the dining room, in the rafters. To get to it, you need to start at the main hall, face the stairs. Proceed along the hallway that leads to the library, eliminating zombies along the way. The library has three zombies in it. Once you clean them out, climb up the stairs surrounding the bookcases, and jump on the middle case. Stand on the B Pad in the middle, press B, and you'll pull out a crossbow: Stick: Aim B: Put away crossbow Hold Z: Laser sight Release Z: Fire When you pull out the bow, there will be four bats that will attack you. You need to kill them before you get the key, otherwise they'll make life miserable for you. There's a bat in each of the four corners, and they'll swoop on you one at a time. Shoot them as they flap around. You can even shoot as they hang from their perches. Once you drop all four, proceed along the stairs, and you'll reach the grinding room at the top. Move around the broken floor around the edge of the room, and you'll end up outside the dining room. Plug the two zombies up here, then proceed along the rafters. Hit the B Pad, and crossbow the three bats at the far end of the room. Move to the end of the rafters and grab the key. Retrace your steps (Dining room, Grinding room, Library, Main Hall) without falling or getting hit, and you'll put the key in the door. Key 2: The second key is in the garden. You could reach it before, but you couldn't get it out, because of the hole leading out of the garden. The good news? That hole's now filled. The bad news? There were no zombies in this area before, but surprise surprise, the path's full of them now... From the main hall, make your way to the path to the dining room, shooting all the zombies. The dining room has quite a few zombies, so hop on the table to deal with them. Once the place is clean, proceed into the garden, keeping an eye out for the undead buggers. Clean out the garden, using the hedges as a perch if you feel so inclined, and grab the second key. Run back through the dining room to the main hall and put the key in the door. Key 3: The third key is on the third floor of the grinding room. A ladder just appeared that can lead you from the second floor of the grinding room up there. Climb up the main hall's stairs, and enter the door on the right. Hop over to the ladder, and climb up. You'll find three life-saving chocolate bars up here, and if you look back in the direction of the main hall, you'll see a lever up here. Float across the broken floor over there and grab it. A secret passage will open, with one end across the room near the key, and the other in the main hall under the right side of the stairs. Now, you can hover over to the key now, and make a break for it, but the safer option is to go back to the main hall, clean it out, and use the secret passage to proceed to the third floor. Walk over to the key, make your way back to the secret passage, and put it in the door, and you're free! Wasn't that easy? --- Mr. Barrel (Revisited) Conker will notice the bony worms again, and he'll also notice Mr. Barrel's sitting next to the stairs (bet you were dyin' to use him). Run over to him and roll out of the house and down the path, as carefully as possible. You'll pick up a lot of speed going down the hill, so you'll have your work cut out for you. Roll the barrel all the way down the path, through the graveyard, down the dock, and out into the lake. Roll upstream towards the passage that you couldn't reach because the current's too fast, and you'll make it this time. Once you enter the passage, you'll be back in the Hungover area, and you'll FINALLY be able to grab that last stack of cash. Make your way out of Hungover and back to Windy. *********************************************************************** J. It's War The hardest, and longest, chapter in the game. This chapter tests your mettle in the furnace heat of battle. The good news is that Conker finally gets decently armed. --- It's War The titular section for the chapter starts when you re-enter Windy, and you get the old '40s newsreel about the war going on. Since Conker doesn't have anything better to do, he might as well sign on. Head in the direction of "Nasty" and you'll see a door with barbed wire in front of it. Finally, that door is open. Hop over the barbed wire and enter. --- Power's Off The sergeant will try to explain to you the situation. Basically, your objective is to clear the way since a bomber plane just crashed into the only way out of the harbor. Hop down to the beach, and he'll mention an electric eel down in the water. Your objective is to lure the eel through those hoops half-buried in the harbor bottom. You only need to lead him through the three hoops that are connected by wires to the harbor. Swim down and through the hoops, and the eel should follow you. Get him through all three, and the power will be restored, and a B Pad will appear. --- TNT Hop out of the water and check out the ramp and the sign that says "TNT". At the top of the ramp, there's a men's room. Press B to knock on the door and a purple guy with a big TNT barrel strapped to his back will wander out. You need to push him to get him going. Only problem is, if you push him down the ramp, he'll slide too far and crash down into the harbor. To prevent that, go to the bottom of the ramp and note the steel box that's sitting in a groove. Push the box along the groove until it's between the ramp and the stairs to the harbor. Now, when you slide TNT Guy down the ramp, he'll stop there. NOTE: If, by ill chance, you lose a TNT Guy in some manner, just go back to the bathroom, and there'll be another one. Okay, you need to bring a TNT Guy to each side of the bomber that's crashed in the harbor exit. You need to take him around the outer edge to get there, and both ways are disaster areas, naturally... You can go either way, but, for the sake of argument, we'll assume that you go, oh, say... left, if you're facing the harbor exit. This way has bouncing ammo boxes. Get behind TNT Guy and push him close to the bouncing boxes. Line yourself up with the box that's bouncing away from you, and follow it as it bounces, trying your best not to touch it. Once you get past that, you'll have to get past a crushing steel box. Simply push him past as the box rises. Then, you have to deal with two more bouncing boxes, and another crushing steel box, and you can deposit the TNT Guy next to the plane. Run back and step on the B Pad in the middle of the harbor. You'll pull out your slingshot, and you can try to hit him with some kind of hot pellet thing to light the barrel. Once it explodes, half the plane is gone. Go back to the bathroom, knock on the door, and grab another TNT Guy. This time, lead him to the right side of the harbor, that looks rather clear. The problem with this side of the harbor, is that there are mines that are hidden in the ground. They surface when you draw near, and when you touch them, they explode. They don't move on their own, though, so don't worry about them chasing you. There is a pattern to where they are hidden. They can be in one of two places vertically. They can be "up", which means closer to the harbor wall, or they can be "down", which means closer to the water. The pattern is as follows: down, down, space, then up, up, down, space, then down, up, down. It's best to go through without the TNT barrel first and get a feel for where the mines are hiding. Once you've pushed the TNT Guy through and left him next to the plane, run back to the B Pad and set him off as you did the first one. The plane will be gone, and you can proceed to the troop transport down by the water, where the Sarge is waiting. --- The Assault And the award for 2nd Best Movie Parody in a Video Game goes to... If you can't tell the movie this scene is parodizing, you're too young to play this game, shame on you... Well, long story short, you're on a beach, and all hell has broken loose. Your mission is to stay alive. In the murder holes above, the Tediz are raining hot lead down upon you, and they're pretty accurate with their shots. To stay alive you'll have to jump from barrier to barrier (those metal X-type things in the sand). Once you reach a barrier, just stay there until the hail of lead subsides, then make a break as fast as possible for the next barrier, ignoring shots whizzing around you (and puncturing holes in the camera lens ^_^). Just make your way from cover to cover as you head for the wall of the complex. --- Sole Survivor Will wonders never cease, you were the only one to make the run. Your fellow soldier here will explain the situation, before getting pegged, himself. It's up to you, soldier. Press B and you'll pull out your cigar, and your weapons: Two 30-round, fully automatic, quick reload, 9mm machine pistols: Stick: Move (slower than normal) B: Take out/Put away guns A: Manually reload R: Aiming Mode (Stick Aims) Z: Fire C Buttons: Strafe As with Spooky and the shotgun, there'll be times where you'll have to put away your guns to be able to jump and move faster. I suppose it goes without saying that you have unlimited ammo, but be careful to reload after every fight. Shoot the lock on the door, grab any chocolate in the area, because you'll need all the health you can get. Okay, inside the corridors, there are a few tips to keep you alive: 1. Assume Tediz are hiding everywhere: behind every crate, around every corner, above every hatch in the ceiling, because they probably are. 2. After every shootout, always reload. Nothing worse than being caught with empty guns. 3. Go for head shots. Kills come quicker that way. 4. There are times when you'll have to put away your guns to jump over laser trip-mines. Do so, but as soon as your in the clear, pull out the guns again, because the bad guys have a nasty habit of ambushing you as soon clear trip-mines. Once again, kudos to Rare on the music here. Very suspenseful, with orchestra hits whenever Tediz rush you. Honestly, I could give you a diagram of this place and you probably would do no better than if I just gave you the preceding tips and said "Good luck". It's that tough. Because I'm a nice guy, though, here's what you can expect inside the corridors. First Room: There are four Tediz here. One will hop up onto a box, one will charge you, and the other two will try to flank you to the left and right. Shoot them all, starting with the one on the box. Once they're gone, the door will open. First Corridor: Crawl under the first set of lasers. Move slowly and walk under the diagonal lasers. Don't let the pipe scare you. Make a left turn, and you'll see a small box to your left and a couple of boxes to your right further on. A Tediz will run out from behind the first box when you get close, and two will run out from behind the stack. Once you get close to the corner, another will run out. Make a right turn, and get close to the lasers, still keeping your guns out, because a Tediz will jump out on the box behind the lasers. Jump in the air, then hover for a couple of seconds. Once you're under the top laser, float through. Immediately whip out your guns, because four Tediz will rush you soon after you land. Keep moving, and watch the ceiling hatches. When you get close to the first one, two Tediz will tumble out of it. Walk under the diagonal laser, and watch the box for a Tediz to jump on it. Two more will pop out of the hatch at the end of this part. Make a gradual left turn, and another two will drop from a hatch, and a third will come from behind the nearby box. Once they're gone, you'll make your way to the elevator, barely avoiding a bunch of nasty mines. Second Corridor: Once you exit the elevator, hop over the first two lasers, then pull out your guns, because a Tediz will drop from a hatch and another will come from behind the box. Cross the last laser and two more will dash from around the corner. Make a right turn, and you'll notice a little guy that looks like the TNT Guy, only he's got a flamethrower. He sprays a constant stream of flame at the wall opposite him, and he can't be harmed, so you can just walk past him when he stops. You have enough time to walk past with the guns out, so keep them out, to be on the safe side. Once you pass the Flame Guy, one Tediz will hop up on a box, and another will charge you from behind it. Pass two more Flame Guys and you'll have four Tediz rushing at you from around the corner. Make a left turn, then deal with the Tediz that comes out of the ceiling hatch. Walk past the vertical lasers (you have room), and take care of the Tediz that drops from the next hatch. After that, one charges from behind the box, and the next one hops on the box. Make a left turn. In this part of the corridor, there are almost no Tediz, but there are three Flame Guys and some lasers on the floor. Make your way past all these, and take your guns out before you reach the corner. Five Tediz will charge around the corner one after the other, so fill the corner with a constant stream of lead at head height to get them all. Make a right turn. A Tediz will pop out of the ceiling hatch, and one will pop out of the next hatch, as well... When you reach the lasers, jump carefully over the first low ones, then walk past the high one, and you're done! --- Casualty Dept. You'll enter what seems to be one those "demented doctor" places you see in some movies, or whatnot. Two Tediz will be hear, casually discussing the game, then they'll notice you and get back into character, chattering as Tediz do. I think the best strategy for this area is to just stay put and fire as you get an opening. The Tediz doctors will attack you three at a time, and you'll fight nine in the area. They dash and duck around the place, behind the tables and boxes, and they'll throw knives, but not very accurately... Take out all the Tediz and walk up to the squirrel in the electric chair. He'll ask you to let him out. Pull either of the two levers, they both do the same thing, then pull the other one to open the door to the next area. The good news? There's only one Tediz in this next room. The bad news? He's strapped behind a heavy caliber turret gun. Dash behind the boxes and wait until he stops to reload. When he does so, dash to the next set of boxes. Keep doing this until you can get right next to him. He can't hit you if you're right next to him. Note the rope nearby. On the next reload, dash for the pipe next to the rope for cover from the next hail of lead, then scale the rope as fast as possible for the hail of lead after that. Run along the top of the crates and you'll end up at a B Pad. Face the gunman, and press B to pull out a lovely bazooka: B: Put away R: Aiming Mode (Stick aims) Z: Fire Make sure the Tediz isn't just starting a new hail of bullets, or you'll get hit. If you can hit him before he finishes his current clip, you'll be fine. Jump down and hop into the seat of the turret gun. You'll now have to fend off a bunch of Tediz that are pouring in from both doors in the area. The first eight or so come from the door on the right. The next wave comes from the door on the left. After that, you'll get a combined wave between the two doors. It's tough, and you'll probably get hit at least once. Good luck. Once you finish, you'll see a door open. Jump out of the gun and head for that open door. In this room, look at that blueprint on the wall... Looks pretty funky, doesn't it? Head down the ramp to the right of the diagram, and you'll head outside. --- Saving Private Rodent You'll be outside here. You'll witness a firing squad about to execute a squirrel. They'll shoot, but he won't be hurt. You have to help him, of course. You have the luxury of the first shot, so line them up so you can hit more than one at once, because these guys are pretty smart, and they have grenades. Once you shoot them up, you'll talk to Rodent, who has a suit on that's pretty much everything-proof. He'll act as your shield for the next area. Sounds good to me... So, proceed along this big trench area, and Conker will notice bombers starting the air attack. Move slowly along the trench, as bombs will drop on certain areas as you get close. After the first bomb drops, Rodent will tell you to get behind him. Do so, because a mine is charging at you. It'll explode when it touches Rodent, but you'll both be fine. Continue along. More mines will attack after the third and fifth bombs, so be sharp. Once you reach the end of the trench, you'll come upon a huge door. To open it, first hop over to the raft floating in the river with the B Pad on it. You'll pull out your bazooka. Fire at the four lights surrounding the lock on the door. Don't worry about getting hurt, or shooting the Tediz who parachute in all over the place. If you shoot all four lights and die afterwards, when you come back, the door will still be open. Just get all four lights before you die... Anyway, rush through the door, ignoring the Tediz... --- Chemical Warfare You'll enter a small area with a brand new Class 22 tank sitting gassed up and ready to go. You're not going on a big ride just yet. You need to open that massive door on the far wall, first. To do that, hop in the tank: Stick Up/Down: Forward/Back Stick Left/Right: Pivot Left/Right A: Get out Z: Fire Left C and Right C: Rotate Turret independently of the tank R: Aiming Mode (Stick aims) Up C and Down C: Zoom in and out in Aiming Mode It's a little unwieldy at first. Drive around a bit to get the feel for it. Aim the turret at the small door with the radiation symbol on it and blast it open. Hop out and run inside. In this small corridor, run until you see a pit of waste. Jump over it, then immediately jump back, because a mine on the other side will run at you. It'll explode when it hits the waste. There are two more pits after this, and a mine for each of them. Once you deal with all of them, pull the lever at the end. The place will start to fill with waste, so hightail it out of there. It's kinda tricky, because you won't be able to rotate the camera to see what's ahead of you. Move your tail to the door, and head back outside. --- The Tower Now, you get an extended ride in the tank, but you've got a problem in the form of a nasty turret gun in a tower at the next area. To dethrone the gun, you need to blast the four supports on the tower with the tank. There are several bridges that you'll need to lower to allow the tank to access the areas from where you can blast the support, but you have two problems. If the gun catches sight of you and you're not in the tank, you'll be shot to pieces. The other problem is that there are several Tediz hiding in the sand in this area. First, start by lowering the first bridge right away, by standing on the high end of it (out of the tank) and pressing B to anvil drop it. Hop back in the tank and roll over the Tediz nearby. Wait until the gun passes, then lower the next bridge, hop in the tank, run over the Tediz. Do this all the way around the tower. Once you've opened up all access and killed all the Tediz, shoot out each of the supports with the Tank. Once all four are gone, the tower will collapse and create a big hole in the middle of the area. Get out of the tank and hop into that hole. --- Little Girl You'll drop into an underground lake area. You'll be on an entrance platform, and the main platform will be surrounded by three piers with B Pads on them. Each of these piers also has a small covered area with a chocolate piece. Go towards the center of the area and you'll find a little girl. She'll warn you about ballistic missiles on the way. These are coming from subs in the water, and you'll have to take them out. The ballistic missiles are dumb, fortunately, and fire at exactly the spot you're standing when you hear them launch, so they're easily avoided. Head towards the pier to the right of the entrance platform (if you're facing it from the center) and wait for the missile to launch, then move towards the B Pad, and you'll pull out your bazooka. Aim for the sub in the water and fire. If the sub fires before you can blow it, move out of the way and let the missile land, then go back and try again. You have to destroy three subs at this pier, and they each come out one at a time. Alternatively, you can try to shoot down the missiles. It's your call. If you miss the missile, you're probably going to get hit, so that's the risk you take. Once the three are destroyed, head clockwise to the next pier. There are two subs firing at a time here, so wait for both to fire before you step on the B Pad. You have to destroy a total of five subs from this pier. Once they're all gone, go to the last pier, where, again, two subs fire at once, and you have to destroy eight subs this time. Once they're all gone, head back to talk to the girl. --- The Experiment As you talk to the girl, Rodent will drop in with the tank. At this point, the girl will perform an Exorcist routine (complete with line) and Conker will get a little wary. The hatch she's sitting in will open completely, and the Tediz experiment will come out. It's basically a robotic spidery lower body and legs, with a huge Tediz upper body and head, with the little girl puppet on the thing's hand. First thing to do is to make a beeline for the tank and hop in before the Experiment can catch up to you. Once you're inside, head immediately for the nearest shelter (those rock formations with chocolate under them) and swivel your turret to face the Experiment, keeping your treads horizontal to it so you can move horizontally. The Experiment will pull out its miniguns. (I love the descriptions) These high-rate weapons will fire in long bursts, with short pauses to reload. During those short pauses, slide the tank out and fire (without aiming) in the general direction of the Experiment, hoping to hit one of its guns. Shoot them both off, and the Experiment will charge you. At this point, get into Aiming Mode and shoot the little girl puppet of the Experiment's hand. The main body will chase after its brain, and the very obvious hatch on its back will open. As if I needed to tell you, fire a shell into the beast's back, then get back under shelter. Now, for the second round of weapons. The Experiment will pull out its Magneto Laser. This doesn't let up, but it aims very slowly, so if you have it aiming towards one side of your shelter, you can slide out the other side and peg one of the guns. Knock them both off, then shoot the puppet, then the back once more. For the final piece of weaponry, it'll deploy fur-seeking missile launchers. These are four missiles to each launcher, so count the missiles as they fly out at you. After four leave each launcher, slide out and fire. Wait for another volley, then slide out and fire again. Once the launchers are gone, shoot the puppet, shoot the back, and you're done. The Experiment, in its defeat, will release mines to destroy the Tank. Conker will make it out in time, but it looks bad for Rodent... --- Countdown That scamp, she rigged this place for self-destruct. Hop into the hole and you'll be back in the first corridor from back in Sole Survivor. This time, however, the place is covered with lasers... Good luck. You have 4 minutes and 30 seconds to get all the way out of here... First Lasers: Coast over the first two low lasers, but be careful not to hit the high one. Jump over the last low one. On the diagonals, jump up onto the box, and float over the first four, then walk under the last one. Alternatively, you can just crawl under the diagonal lasers. Second Lasers: Simply jump into the air and float between the second and third vertical lasers. Third Lasers: Hop onto the box and land in between them all. Jump into the air, and float for two seconds. When you get low enough (your butt will pass the upper laser) float through. Pull out your guns and take out the two Tediz waiting just around the corner. Fourth Lasers: I found a good way to get around this. Two boxes are on the left side. Get on the first box, and crawl under the wires, remaining on the box the whole time. Drop off it when you're on the other side. A Tediz will rush you from around the corner. Fifth Lasers: I've received a couple of ways to do this, but here's what I think works best. Thanks to Paul Bliss for this. There's a hole at the top on the left side. Get as close as you can to the lasers, then High Jump and float over. Sixth Lasers: Simple. Crawl under them. In this last room, you'll be set upon by Tediz as you try to leave. Don't be sliced by the lasers that suddenly appear in front of the exit. It kinda stinks that you're stuck with the bazooka, though, for this part. Just shoot as straight as you can and don't blow yourself up. Okay, now you're outside on the beach. Bullets will be whizzing all around you. Ignore them. Your problem is actually Tediz on the beach that have bazookas. There are two ways to get through this. Ignore the Tediz and try to frantically jump your way to freedom, or try to pick them off one at a time with your own bazooka. Either way requires a considerable measure of luck and skill. Here's a map of the area... | --------------------------| | 8 7 4 | X = Crosshatch Barrier | X X | #'s = Tediz (Order you should shoot | 6 5 | them) |-------------------- | | 3 | | X X | | 1 | | ---------------------|2 | | |__| | Start | If, at any time, you die during this, you'll restart at the beginning here with 2:00 on the clock, which is plenty of time, even if you decide to stay and shoot. Okay. First head along the fence towards 1, and pull out your bazooka to shoot him. Next move slowly along the fence and keep going until 2 is visible. Shoot him, then pan left and shoot 3. Head past the second horizontal fence and 4 and 5 will appear. 4 is just to the left of the barrier, so aim that way before you see him and shoot just when he shows his face, then pan left and shoot 5. Move along towards the spot where 6 will appear (to the left of the barrier). 6, 7, and 8 will all appear at once. Hit 6 ASAP, then pan to the right and immediately shoot 7. 8 is behind the barrier from where you're standing, so you have a small reprieve. Wait until his missile hits the barrier, then strafe until you can see him and shoot. Put away the bazooka and make your run for freedom. --- Peace at Last! Nothin' to do here, really, except watch the cutscene and return to Windy. *********************************************************************** K. Heist You're in the home stretch, now. This chapter isn't long, but it can get tough. Good luck. --- The Windmill's Dead Well, just as the title says, as soon as you re-enter Windy, if you look at where the windmill was, you'll see it's now in pieces all over the ground. Head up to the ruins, and you'll see Rodent survived after all, the trooper. Head inside the ruins, and head through the hole at the bottom. Well, how 'bout that? You're standing in front of the Feral Reserve Bank, the place you couldn't get to oh-so-long ago. Walk in front of the steps, and you'll meet your old pal, The Boss. He'll offer you another job, of knocking over the bank. Hey! Berri's back! And she's sporting a rather fetching black leather ensemble. Conker will agree to do the job, but only if he gets an outfit as cool as hers. Once Conker's changed, run up to the bank and through the revolving door. --- Enter the Vertex And the award for Absolute Best Movie Parody in a Video Game goes to... Once again, if you don't recognize the movie parody, you're too young to play this game. Shame on thou... All right, once you get control of Conker, head for the nearest pillar. Note that each pillar has a B Pad in front of it. Wait for the two weasel guards to start shooting at you. As soon as you hear the word "Regroup!", press B. Hee hee... Aim using the Stick and fire while pressing Z. One hit will take out a weasel. NOTE: You can shoot these guys normally, but they're very good shots and they take a lot of normal hits to put down. You're best off using the B Pads, of course. Also, a good time to use the B Pad is if the weasels start shooting at Berri. Her whole point here is to draw fire for you. You CAN get shot while in your little jump, so it's best to avoid that chance altogether. Anyway, once you shoot the first two, another two will show up. Once you take those down, Berri will shut off the laser field and you can proceed to the next set of pillars. Two waves of three weasels will attack here. Deal with them in the same manner. At the next set of pillars, another two waves of three weasels will attack. At the last set of pillars, two waves of four weasels will attack. This part's hard, as they have enough concentrated shots to tear your hiding place to shreds and nail you. If they wear the pillar down, just take the chance and jump. You can always try again if you die, and replay this incredibly fun scene again. Anyway, once the weasels are all taken out, walk towards the elevator. In the next area, you'll face a rather complicated network of laser beams. Fortunately, Berri has things in hand, so just proceed into the Vault. --- The Vault There's a lot of cash running around here. Basically, just whack them with your pan to grab them. Grab three wads and the game will continue for you. I won't spoil this next cutscene, so I'll just wait here until you're done... ... *whistles* *checks watch* Done? Okay. If you haven't noticed, things have gone to hell in a handbasket. It's you against a rather nasty (and familiar) looking alien. First, run over to the lever in the wall and pull it. You'll open the airlock, and a hatchway with a space suit. This goes without saying, but don't get too close to the vortex of sucking air, whether or not you're in your space suit. Anyway, hop into the space suit, and prepare to take down Heinrich the Alien: Stick: Move A: Jump (using boosters) B: Punch Z: Block The alien has two attacks: One is to rush up and bite you, and the other is to spin its tail along the ground to try to trip you up. It's tough, but try your best to rush in when you get an opening and punch it several times. Once you give it an uppercut, it'll collapse on the ground. Walk around behind the alien and walk to where its tail connects to the rest of its body to pick it up. Don't walk to the end of the tail, just where it connects to the body. Here's where all that Super Mario 64 pays off. Slowly rotate the stick to swing the alien around. It doesn't matter which way. Slowly increase your speed and eventually, the alien will be so that its nails aren't scraping the floor. When it's aimed at the airlock, hit B and you'll toss it. It'll jump back in, but that's one. You need to throw it at the door three times to win. Be careful on the second and subsequent tries, because the alien will wise up a bit and dodge your punches a little more effectively. You'll have to time your movements. When it lunges to the side, immediately jump, because it'll spin. When it lunges back, press Z to block and it'll be stunned. You can then punch the crud out of it and throw it out. --- End Cutscene Sit. Watch. Good boy. Well, good work. Conker has survived his Bad Fur Day. Now, you can relax with some Multiplayer and speculate on how bad Conker's next day will be, which we will hopefully find out on the GameCube sequel. *********************************************************************** 5. Multiplayer Although not as an extensive multiplayer experience as, say, Goldeneye, or Perfect Dark, Conker's BFD offers a nice array of options to have fun with your friends. *********************************************************************** A. Settings Each multiplayer game has it's own individual settings that can be tweaked to your own personal desires. Here's the basic rundown of attributes you'll find in most areas... AI: The computer's intelligence. Inbred - Crap - Normal - Bastard - Einstein Dumbest<-------------------------->Smartest Time: Naturally, the length of time the match carries on for. Can be anywhere between 3 and 10 minutes. Can sometimes be unlimited, but Lives have to be set in its place... Lives: The number of lives you have before you're out of the game. This can be anywhere between 1 and 5, and can sometimes be set to unlimited, but you need to set a time in its place. NOTE: One or the other of Time and Lives is always unlimited if both are present in a game. Radar: On or Off. Dots indicated other players. A black line above the dot means the person is above you, and a black line below means the person is below you. Score: Some games have their own method of scoring, which can be set. Other games have individual settings. --- Here's how each game uses the settings: Beach AI: Inbred - Einstein Score: 1 - 40 Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Raptor AI: Inbred - Einstein Score: 1 - 40 Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Lives: 1 - 5, Infinite Radar: On/Off Heist AI: Inbred - Einstein Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Lives: 1 - 5, Infinite Radar: On/Off Money Bags: 1 - 5 (The # of money bags to retrieve) War AI: Inbred - Einstein Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Lives: 1 - 5, Infinite Radar: On/Off Tank AI: Inbred - Einstein Kills: 1 - 10, Unlimited (# of Kills by one person before game is over) Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Lives: 1 - 5, Infinite Radar: On/Off Turret: On/Off (2nd or 4th player has the option of controlling 1st or 3rd player's turret) Race AI: Inbred - Einstein Lives: 1 - 5 Laps: 1 - 20 Deathmatch AI: Inbred - Einstein Kills: 1 - 10, Unlimited (# of Kills by one person before game is over) Time: 3 - 10, Unlimited Lives: 1 - 5, Infinite Radar: On/Off --- Player/Computer Settings You can modify the number of computer players differently for different games. Team games can only give you a very small number of computer players, but in free-for-alls, with few humans, you can pack it on. Heist Pretty simple. There are always four players. Anyone not played by a human is a computer. Deathmatch 1P: 9 Computers 2P: 8 Computers 3P: 1 Computer 4P: No Computers Tank (Turrets Controller don't count) 1P: 7 Computers 2P: 2 Computers 3P: 1 Computer 4P: No Computers Race 1P: 7 Computers 2P: 2 Computers War (Total War or Colors) With the team games you can use the C Buttons on the Team Select to adjust the balance of the number of players. 1P: 1C vs C, 1 vs C, 1 vs CC 2P: 1P vs 2P: 1C vs 2, 1 vs 2, 1 vs 2C 1P/2P vs C: 12CC vs C, 12C vs C, 12 vs CC, 12 vs CCC, 12 vs CCCC 3P: 12 vs 3C, 13 vs 2C, 23 vs 1C 4P: 13 vs 24 Beach/Raptor Since one team has the advantage over another, you cannot adjust the scale too much in favor of the Tediz/Raptors. For simplicity's sake, the left side of these setups are always the weaker, and the right side is the stronger. Left vs. Right Frenchies vs. Tediz Uggas vs. Raptors 1P: 1C vs C, 1 vs C, CC vs 1 2P: 1P vs 2P: 1C vs 2, 1 vs 2, 2 vs 1, 2C vs 1 1P/2P vs C: 12CC vs C, 12C vs C, 12 vs CC C vs 1P/2P: C vs 12, CC vs 12, CCC vs 12, CCCC vs 12 3P: 13 vs 2C and any other combination thereof, as long as two are each side. 4P: 13 vs 24 *********************************************************************** B. Weapons No multiplayer game involving blood and guts would be complete without a lovely assortment of killing apparati, and Conker is no exception. Note that picking up any weapon will drop the old one (with the exception of bombs). Take that into account as you battle. --- Close-Combat The nice thing about close-combat weapons is that you enjoy no loss in mobility. You can still jump and everything. The bad news, naturally, is that you have to get close... --- Baseball Bat Bone Bat Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Jump Z: Swing C Buttons: Camera Functions Damage: 1 The only true advantage to these weapons is that you automatically spawn with them, in the Heist and Temple arenas. A Baseball Bat does make a good fail-safe weapon for knocking out a money-carrier, and if you can hit your enemy enough times in succession, it'll add up. --- Chainsaw Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Jump Z: Swing C Buttons: Camera Functions Damage: 6 (Instant Kill) Rev up the Poulan and get your hockey mask. This is a good weapon if you're agile enough to get close, and the swing is relatively quick, so your instant kill will come easily... --- Katana Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Flip Z: Swing C Buttons: Camera Functions Damage: Slash - 1 Follow-up Slice - 6 (Instant Kill) I love this weapon. I've analyzed it, and it doesn't make you any faster, or jump any higher, but it does have some nice perks. To make the kill, you need to hit the enemy with one slash, then hit the button again to decapitate them, but the perks don't end there. Your footfalls are now silent. You are invisible to radar, and you can survive falls that would normally harm you. Note, however, that you cannot survive falls that would normally kill you... --- Throwing Knives Bone Knives Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Jump Z: Throw R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: 1 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Yeah, I know they're not close-combat, but they don't fit anywhere, so I stuck 'em here. Knives are okay, but they're probably on the bottom of the weapons totem pole. There's really always something stronger, faster, or more convenient. But, at the end of the day, you may find that a well-placed knife can still save your bacon. --- Automatics Some automatics require you to reload every so often. As is always the case, the big advantage with automatics is you can lay down a spray of fire and have a better chance of hitting someone. --- Semi-Auto Rifle Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Reload Manually Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: 2 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Clip: 30 Mobility Loss: None Not a bad weapon. It gets decent points for causing damage, but being semi-auto, you need to keep pressing Z to fire it. The reload time is pretty long, too... --- Machine Guns Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Reload Manually Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: 1 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Clip: 30 X 2 Mobility Loss: None A really good all-around weapon. Probably the only thing bad about this is the fact that, for some reason, it's tough to aim while moving, but, that aside, it's an excellent piece of weaponry for putting down the bad guys. --- Tommy Gun Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: 2 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Mobility Loss: None At first, I thought there was something screwy with this gun, until I realized the truth. It's got a nasty kickback. Fire it for more than a couple of seconds, and you're stitching holes in the ceiling. It's got infinite ammo, so short controlled bursts are what work here. --- Turret Gun Stick: Aim A: Jump in/Jump out B: Reload Manually Z: Fire C Up/Down: Zoom Damage: 2 Clip: 80 (?) Mobility Loss: Full Naturally, it's full mobility loss, 'cause you're not moving at all! In the furnace heat of battle, you can usually find something better than the Turret Gun to use, because you leave yourself wide open, and it's really tough to handle. Of course, if you can pin down an opponent with this puppy, then, by all means, go for it! --- Long-Range Weapons Hope you're relatively safe, because these weapons are for campers only... --- Sniper Rifle Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire (Hold for laser sight, release for shot) R: Aiming Mode C Left/Right: Strafe C Up/Down: Zoom Damage: 1 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Mobility Loss: Slight The de facto sniper weapon. Naturally, the advantage to this is that you can strike from afar, which can be quite useful at times. This rifle has a very slow rate of fire, so beware, and don't shoot unless you're sure you've got a hit. --- Crossbow Bone Crossbow Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire (Hold for laser sight, release for shot) R: Aiming Mode C Left/Right: Strafe C Up/Down: Zoom Damage: 1 (Head Shot: Instant Kill) Mobility Loss: Slight What's the difference between this and the Sniper Rifle? This has a lesser zoom extent, and the bolts travel slower than a bullet, but, it has a higher fire rate than the Rifle. What's better? That's a choice I leave to you, the consumer... --- Power Weapons Good for one (or two) shot kills, and also for incapacitating enemies. The big problem with these guys is either their fire rate, their range, the loss to mobility, or any combination of those. --- Hand Cannon (Magnum Pistol) Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away A: Reload Manually Z: Fire (Hold for laser sight, release for shot) R: Aiming Mode C Left/Right: Strafe C Up/Down: Zoom Damage: 6 (Instant Kill) Clip: 6 Mobility Loss: Moderate Yup. No matter where you hit someone with a Cannon shot, it'll spell instant doom (unless they're a Raptor). You even have a limited zoom with it. Naturally, this power comes at a cost. A slow rate of fire, a need to reload after six shots, and the mobility loss are all the price you pay for this. --- Shotgun Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: Far Shot - 3 Close Shot - 6 (Instant Kill) Mobility Loss: Slight In a world of jumping around and fast guns, the shotgun had to improve over it's single player incarnation. The fact that you hit really hard with a decent spread makes this a viable choice for weaponry in the arena. --- Flamethrower Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: 1 Mobility Loss: Moderate Not one of my favorites, but I suppose it could be useful in some situations, or if nothing better comes to hand. Hold down Z to release a steady stream of flame. Once your adversary catches fire, they'll run around in panic for a couple of seconds, allowing you to set them up for the next hit (which you can't do until they stop moving). If anyone (including you) touches someone on fire, they'll catch fire as well, so be careful when using it. --- Bazooka Stick: Move B: Take out/Put away Z: Fire R: Aiming Mode C Buttons: Strafe Damage: Near Miss - 2 Direct Hit - Instant Kill Mobility Loss: Major Nice gun if you can get it. These are usually put out of the way, or in the most direct line of fire. Like the damage count says, even if you miss a bit, you'll hurt the enemy, and you'll also knock him for a loop. Naturally, a big weapon slows you down a lot, so put it away when no one's nearby, or if you come under considerable fire. --- Grenades Rock Bombs Black Bombs Pipe Bombs Stick: Move C Down: Hold to take out bomb. Release to throw. Damage: Near Miss - 2 Direct Hit - Instant Kill Mobility Loss: Major The only true "second weapon" you can have. You'll start every Heist, War, Raptor (if you're an Ugga), or Deathmatch with three Bombs. They're rather awkward to use. The longer you hold C Down, the farther you'll throw the bomb (which never ends up being very far). If you want the maximum benefit from Bombs, drop them off higher ledges onto your enemies. Each Bomb Box you collect will add three to your total, for a max of six. *********************************************************************** B. Special Scenarios Besides the standard Deathmatch, Conker offers you six specialized scenarios to take on. Enjoy. --- Beach Omaha Beach... June 5th... I was early... This is a team game. One team is the Frenchies. They're unarmed squirrels whose job is to get to the bottom of the Tediz base and into the truck to Paris. The other team are the Tediz, who are confined to their base above the beach, whose job it is to cut down the Frenchies at all costs. Frenchies: Each Frenchie you start with has ninety seconds to make its run. After those ninety seconds, a laser zaps you. Here's the basic layout. You'll start on one of two docks. Straight ahead is a trench running horizontally. This trench is tough to jump out of, so take the bridge over it if you don't want to be in there. You'll be safe. Unfortunately, this is pretty much the last place you're safe. There are basically three pathways to make your run here. Middle Path: Naturally, this is the shortest, and it's wide open. It's a big narrow trench running straight to freedom. You're a sitting duck here, but if you trust your dodging abilities, give it a ride... Right Path: This area's covered in the beginning, but opens up relatively quick. It's big, and there's a lot of room to run around. It starts in a area with foxholes and then you can drop down onto a large open platform. On the corner of this platform (where it meets the wall) is a bottle of Power Pills that will give you a speed boost. Use them at your own risk... Left Path: This is the most covered path, early on. There's a big rock covering you as you hug the left wall, and you'll soon come across a bottle of Power Pills. Don't celebrate too quickly, because the road to freedom is tricky. The path is suspended over a pit. A fall in will score one for the Tediz, and the path is narrow and zig-zags. You may be better off leaping from the center path from here and hot- dogging to the exit. There is also an Upper Path for your consideration. It runs horizontally midway to the base. There are two ways to get there. You can follow the trench and you'll run around the right wall and onto the path, or you can take the left path. Once you get to the twisting path there'll be a passage in the wall that will connect you to the Upper Path. From here, you can jump onto the big rock. On this rock is a TNT Plunger. Jump on it, and the Tediz are history. Tediz: You are confined to the three sections of the base. The middle section has the big Turret Gun for your pleasure. You can also run to the ramps on the right or left side of the gun to access the other two sections. Going up the right ramp automatically arms you with a Sniper Rifle, and going up the left ramp automatically arms you with a Bazooka. Use whatever you feel most comfortable with. Scoring: Frenchie Escapes: +1 Frenchie Frenchie Killed (any means): +1 Tediz Tediz Killed (any means): +1 Frenchie --- Raptor This scenario pits the Uggas against the Raptors in a food-snatching showdown. The Uggas want the Raptor's eggs for dinner, and the Raptors want the Uggas for dinner. This is another team game. I really don't like this scenario, mainly because life is seriously stacked against the Uggas, and you'll need to be a smart Ugga to win. Uggas: Weapons: Bone Bat, Bone Knives, Bone Crossbow, Rock Bombs As previously stated, you're in for a rough ride. Grabbing an egg will give you a slight mobility loss, which is more than enough for any Raptor to catch up to you and chow down. The only real way to survive this (unless you've got a bunch of Uggas against one Raptor) is to find a perch and snipe at the Raptors with Knives or the Crossbow. You get points for killing Raptors as well as grabbing eggs, so concentrate on the former. Of course, if by any chance, you get an opening, and can grab an egg, you'll get 3 points. Raptors: Stick: Move A: Jump B/Z: Bite C Buttons: Camera Functions It's good to be a Raptor. You can use your bite to eat any non-Raptor adversary whole, and any attack that hits you, no matter what attack or where, does only one damage. The only disadvantage is that you have no long range attack, so anyone that snipes on you has the upper hand. Also, being the Raptor can tend to make you the target, because no one wants to slug it out with the other guy when there's a hungry dino charging him. If you bite an Ugga, you can carry him to your baby back at the nest for an extra point. Score: Egg Fried: +3 Ugga Raptor Killed by Ugga: +1 Ugga Ugga Killed by Raptor: +1 Raptor Baby Fed: +1 Raptor --- Heist All right youse mugs. Time to hit the Feral Reserve Bank. I like this one, even though it can sometimes get drawn out. This game is always four-player, no matter how many humans you use. There is always one Red, one Blue, one Green, and one Yellow no matter how you slice it. Your objective is to grab the Money Bag in the center of the bank and bring it back to your safe. Weapons: Baseball Bat, Black Bombs, Throwing Knives, Tommy Gun, Crossbow, Bazooka Strategies: Yellow and Green have a slight advantage in this game. On their way back to their vault, they make a turn in their zone, shielding them from long-range attacks, whereas the Blue and Red are open the entire run back. Grabbing the Money Bag will give you a slight mobility loss, so if you're in the central area, make sure no one is around when you make a break for it, otherwise you'll be nailed. You can sometimes avoid long range weapons, but if anyone catches up to you with their bat, expect to be hit and dropping the bag. When dropped, the Money Bag will attempt to hop back to its spot in the center. Try to snag it before then to give yourself a headstart. Scoring: Money Bag Snagged: +1 (You can't score by getting Kills in this game. However, if there's a tie at the end. The victory goes to the person with the most Kills.) --- War It's Squirrels versus Tediz, in all out combat. This is a team game. You'll pick a side and choose one of the battles. --- Total War Like the title says, the way to glory is to shoot the other side. You each have your own base, and each side is identical. It's not just straight killing, though. You also have the option of grabbing a chemical canister from your enemy's base, carrying it to the insertion point underground, and flooding the area with gas, killing anyone who's not in the insertion point or not wearing a mask. Weapons: Chainsaw, Katana, Throwing Knives, Semi-Auto Rifle, Machine Guns, Sniper Rifle, Hand Cannon, Flamethrower, Bazooka, Grenades, Pipe Bombs So, here's the setup. Your Base: On the lower floor, there's a box of Bombs. There's a room in the back that has Machine Guns and a Semi-Auto Rifle. There's a ramp that runs around the back upper floor that has a Katana and Throwing Knives. Up the ramp to the right of the door is a doorway that will take you to the sniper's roost, where you can find a Sniper Rifle. Out the main door you'll reach the Trench Field. Up the ramp to the left will be a passage that'll take you to the upper part of the Trench Field. Down the passage on the lower floor will take you down to the sewers. Partway down, you'll find a Hand Cannon, and further down a side passage with a Flamethrower. In the middle is the canister insertion point. Trench Field: An S-shaped trench runs the length of the field. Along the trench, there's a hole that'll drop you into the sewers and onto the Flamethrower. On the upper fields, you'll find a Chainsaw, and there's a bridge connecting the two upper fields that has the lone Bazooka on it. The canisters are on the upper ramp of each base. If someone places a canister in the insertion point, everyone will have five seconds to either duck into the insertion point chamber or grab one of the three gas masks in each base to survive. Strategies: Pretty basic stuff applies here. If someone grabs the canister, don't try to stop them unless you have a really good chance. Just go for a mask. Score: Tediz kills Squirrel: +1 Tediz Squirrel kills Tediz: +1 Squirrel (Suicides and kills by same team don't count against you) --- Colors This is a basic Capture the Flag scenario. You have to reach the top of the enemy base and take their flag back to your base. Pretty simple. Weapons: Chainsaw, Katana, Throwing Knives, Semi-Auto Rifle, Machine Guns, Turret Gun, Sniper Rifle, Hand Cannon, Flamethrower, Bazooka, Grenades, Pipe Bombs The layout of this place is a remake of the Beach. What's changed is that there's a matching Squirrel base where the beach was, and each base battlements and entrances are now connected. Each Base: There are two entrances that lead out to the main field, and the main lobby area has the flag insertion point (where you take the opposing flag). On the floor there are Machine Guns. Up the ramp you'll find a Hand Cannon and a box of Bombs. Continue up the wooden ramp and you'll reach the Turret Gun. To the left and right are ramps that lead up to nests. To the right is the sniper's nest with a Sniper Rifle, and to the left is an empty area, but another path that leads to a Katana and the flag. Middle Area: Identical to the Beach in just about every way. There are Throwing Knives on the zigzag path outside the pathway, and under the bridge in the trench. There's a Flamethrower in the foxhole area. There are two boxes of Bombs where the Power Pills are supposed to be. There's a Chainsaw on the upper path, and, where the TNT Plunger in Beach was, there's a Bazooka. Strategies: Flag-bearers are vulnerable, but you can drop the flag by pressing B. Standard killing tactics apply here, besides... Scoring: Squirrel Captures Tediz Flag: +1 Squirrel Tediz Captures Squirrel Flag: +1 Tediz If there's a tie, the win goes to who got the most kills. *********************************************************************** 6. Miscellany --- A. Money Locations There are a couple of points in the game where you have to have a certain amount of money to pass. If you're looking for extra cash, here's where they all are, and where you can find details on picking them up in the walkthrough. $100 - Help Mrs. Bee the first time (Windy: Mrs. Bee) $100 - Roof of Barn (Barn Boys: Marvin) $100 - Alcove above the Sunflower (Barn Boys: Sunny Days) $100 - After beating Haybot (Barn Boys: Frying Tonight) $100 - The sewer tunnel near the barn (Barn Boys: Slam Dunk) $100 - Sewers under Poo Cabin (Windy II: Sewage Sucks) $100 - Through the wasp nest's holes (Windy II: Great Balls of Poo) $100 - Top of Poo Mountain (Windy II: Great Balls of Poo) $100 - Bats Tower (very top) (Bats Tower: Barry's Mate) $10 - Catfish's Safe (Bats Tower: Brass Monkeys) $300 - In the catfish area above the Bullfish's resting place (Bats Tower: Bullfish's Revenge) $100 - In front of the flush handle in the Great Mightypoo's lair (Sloprano: U-Bend Blues) $100 - Entry to Uga Buga (Sloprano: The Bluff) $100 - On top of the big dino idol in Uga Buga (Uga Buga: Phlegm) $100 - Rock Solid Club, in Berri's former cage (Uga Buga: Rock Solid) $100 - At the end of the race with the muggers (Uga Buga: Mugged) $100 - After beating Buga the Knut (Uga Buga: Buga the Knut) $400 - Help Mrs. Bee a second time (Windy III: Wasps' Revenge) $100 - Escape Spooky (Spooky: Mr. Barrel) --- B. Tail Locations Lives are pretty much a joke in Conker's BFD. When you get a Game Over, you start in exactly the same spot you would if you had lost a life, but, if you're worried about staying alive. Here are the Tail Locations in the game. Windy: On the Nasty/Nice signpost In the Sewage area after you've filled it with the cows Barn Boys: In the sewer tunnel On the side of the barn, opposite the door switch Under a big part of the landscape behind the cheese enclosure (10) Bats Tower: Behind a waterfall at the Bullfish's river Sloprano: In the spinning blades area Uga Buga: On the big idol's neck In the area after you beat Buga the Knut (5) --- C. Cheat Codes Here ya go. These are the cheats that have been revealed so far, by Conker Himself, XAnimal, and Parasyte. All credit goes to them. Chapter Opening Codes: After these codes are entered, you can play the chapter indicated by accessing the Chapters menu. Of course, if you've beaten the game, they're not worth much. PRINCEALBERT - Barn Boys CLAMPIRATE - Bats Tower ANCHOVYBAY - Sloprano MONKEYSCHIN - Uga Buga SPANIELSEARS - Spooky BEELZEBUBSBUM - It's War CHOCOLATESTARFISH - Heist WELDERSBENCH - All Chapters Multiplayer Characters: After these codes are entered, you can use the character or characters indicated in Deathmatches and Races. WELLYTOP - Conker EASTEREGGSRUS - Neo Conker BILLYMILLROUNDABOUT - Gregg, the Grim Reaper, both with and without robe CHINDITVICTORY - Striped shirt weasel, and black suit weasel RUSTYSHERIFFSBADGE - Squirrel Sergeant and Tediz Leader BEEFCURTAINS - Male Zombie, Female Zombie, Male Frenchie/Villager, Female Frenchie/Villager EATBOX - Normal Caveman and the four racing cavemen Other Codes: SPUNKJOCKEY - Try slicing someone in one player Deathmatches... XFYHIJERPWAL IELWZS - Debug Mode BOVRILBULLETHOLE - Start with 50 lives DRACULASTEABAGS - Allows the use of the Baseball Bat in Race DUTCHOVENS - Allows the use of the Frying Pan in Race EASY - Opens Easy Mode (?) VERYEASY - Opens Very Easy Mode (?) About the Debug Mode: This is a classic "lift the cartridge corner" thing, if you're familiar with messing around with your games. I don't recommend it, though, and assume no responsibility if you mess up your game using this... Are there more codes? Possibly... Also, if you type in naughty words, you'll get a reaction from the Fire Imp... ^_^ *********************************************************************** 7. Legal This FAQ was made 100% by me, Scott "CyricZ" Zdankiewicz. You may not take it in whole or in part and claim it as your own. You must ask me before posting this on your site, and it must remain in its original text format. I spent a lot of time on this. Give me some credit. Currently, the following sites have permission to post this FAQ. www.gamefaqs.com vgstrategies.about.com www.gamespot.com www.cheatcc.com *********************************************************************** 8. Credits CJayC, Al Amaloo, and all the other webmasters, for putting this up on their sites. Paul Bliss, for a few tips on the Its War chapter. Rare, for being gods among mortals once again. Nintendo, for having the cojones to authorize this. *********************************************************************** 9. Version Updates Version 1.1 - 3/23/2001 - Cleaned up some stuff in the walkthrough. Added my first batch of multiplayer stuff. Enjoy yo'selves... Version 1.0 - 3/13/2001 - Single player is finished. Multiplayer will be up in due course. Version 0.8 - 3/12/2001 - Uga Buga, Windy III, and Spooky are up. Also put up the Miscellany section and updated the FAQ... Version 0.7 - 3/11/2001 - Bats Tower, Windy II, and Sloprano are up. Version 0.5 - 3/9/2001 - Hungover and Barn Boys are complete... I'll admit it. This was a visibility update... *********************************************************************** 10. The Final Word Well, there you have it. Some people think of this game as a step backward in quality of games, but I disagree. This is an absolutely hilarious jump in gaming quality, and I suggest you not knock it before you try it. If you're interested in looking at any of my other FAQs, I wrote FAQs for Perfect Dark, Ogre Battle 64, and Star Wars: Battle for Naboo. Check them out, won't you? Take care, have fun, and don't be so stuck up! ~_^